Chicken Fried Vogue

For 15 years and most of her adult life, Bubblez lived in the suburbs of a major metropolitan city. She enjoyed taking her children to museums, parks, and dates at Starbucks. Then Bubblez moved to the country and her En Vogue attitude got chicken fried. Her yard is a park where the neighbor's rooster won't stop crowing, Starbucks is almost an hour away, and her large collection of fancy shoes is worthless. But, living in the acres of green has presented more opportunities for living "green" as Bubblez travels the path toward self-sufficiency (and bitches ((and prays)) along the way).

Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Leaning Green And Still Pimpin'

I have had the hardest time pinning down a blog "theme" and figuring out my niche in the writing world. Like everything else that is a part of me, writing is something I am skilled at but it still manages to lack the kind of oomph that makes it something special. I was an art major in college. That went absolutely nowhere. After I grew up a little bit, I realized that I was afraid to be an artist, and that is why I failed. Skills, yes. Oomph, no. I'm not afraid to be a writer. With writing, I have a different problem. Subject matter. Theme. Consistency.

I am like many personalities in one person, except not in a clinically disconcerting way because my personalities all know each other and get along, although sometimes "church" personality does like to guilt trip "boozer" personality and they argue about whether or not Jesus minded that I... wait, what did I do last night?

The point is, I am a person of many varying interests, and how do you sum that up in one interesting little tagline? And are any of those interests very interesting, anyway? Sure, anything can be, I guess, but if your readers come to you looking for advice on how to prevent end rot on their tomatoes (add calcium to the soil in the form of crushed Tums), and what you give them is, oh... that's what I did last night... no wonder Church was mad, those readers are going to leave and possibly never come back.

So, I feel like I need to focus in on some kind of catagory, ya dig? I homeschool. I love educating, and I'm good at it, but I don't really want to write about it all the time. (Grammatically, it is incorrect to write "homeschool" as one word, by the way. I do it, anyway, because I'm a rebel, not because I'm dumb. Back off, ok.) I cook. I parent. I craft. I garden. I do none of this consistently and obsessively enough to make a blog out of it. No, not even parenting. *hangs head*

So, I made a decision. Like the majority of other no-name bloggers out there, I will simply write about life. If Jerry Seinfeld can make a show about nothing, I can do the same with a blog, right? Of course, that would require making up a bunch of stuff that isn't really true and seriously, like I've got the energy (booze) for that. Did I just negate myself? I think I did.

Whatever. All of this babbling is just my way of announcing,  unnecessarily, that I reserve the right to change my tagline regularly and without warning, as it suits me, with little or no regard to you. So, stick that in your juice box and suck it.

Today's new tagline is: Leaning Green And Still Pimpin' because that pretty much sums up what's been going on in my life as of late. I dyed my hair and started wearing warpaint when I leave the house, and, most of my thoughts seem to be consumed by the idea of becoming environmentally self sufficient. They only seem unrelated. Ok, they are.

Not bad, eh? Except for the bit of liner that looks like an eye-booger.

I've been thinking a lot about gardening and farming and how to avoid going to the grocery store because I hate taking the time to do it and because the grocer takes all of my money leaving me with nothing to spend at the bar.. erm, put in the offering plate. I've also been really focussed on eliminating our garbage bill by digging my own landfill in the back yard. No, that's not true. We recycle so much that we only crank out about two 13 gallon garbage bags a week. I'm thinking we need to get on the burning and composting thing, and then we'll be golden.

I guess that's all I've got for today. I'm keeping the line for a while although my next blog might be a tutorial on how to sew a bathrobe.

In the words of Red Green, "Keep your stick on the ice." It should be cold enough.

1 comment:

  1. Tell church personality to lay off boozer personality! ;) We learned in church that Jesus was a party-er. Yeah, you got that right. Jesus was hanging out at a wedding party (which were THE parties-to-end-all-parties) and they RAN OUT OF WINE so Mary brought it Jesus' attention. And did He say "well good, they have obviously had enough!" ? No, He did not. Instead He turned water into wine...gallons and gallons of REALLY GOOD wine. Let the party continue!!